Relationship OCD

Although Relationship OCD is not very widely talked about as one of the main symptoms of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD), Relationship OCD (otherwise known as Relationship Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, or ROCD) affects many OCD sufferers – many of whom are unaware that their intrusive thoughts and images are actually connected to their OCD.

What is Relationship OCD?

In Relationship OCD, it is common for sufferers to repeatedly question whether their current partner is really the right person for them, and whether they actually love their partner or not. Most people are well aware of the fact that no relationship is without its flaws and bad points, but sufferers of Relationship OCD are often unable to recognise this.

This can lead sufferers to believe that they cannot be truly in love with their partner. In other cases, they can also think that they are somehow too 'flawed' to love another person. Either way, Relationship OCD will often result in temporary or permanent break-ups, and sufferers will often throw away relationships that are perfectly adequate because they feel that their feelings for their partner are not how they should be. This tends to put huge strain on the relationship, which sufferers may also use as a 'sign' that the relationship is failing or has already failed.

If sufferers go on to end the relationship, they will often have no real idea as to why they are doing so (other than the fact that their feelings are not 'right'), and cannot give a good enough reason if pressed.

Even if sufferers know deep down that they do love their partner, they will frequently check with themselves that this is still real. The constant doubts eat away at the sufferer and are often mentally exhausting - as is the case with most OCD symptoms.

Triggers for Relationship OCD

Relationship OCD can be triggered by different thoughts and images, and this will often vary from sufferer to sufferer. Movies, television programmes and songs can often act as strong triggers.

When watching or listening to these, sufferers of Relationship OCD will often begin to question why their relationship does not mirror the deep emotional connection that is on display, without taking into account the fact that these are idealised and often entirely unrealistic. They can convince themselves that their relationship is not working because it is not the same. These thoughts can become all-consuming, to the point where the sufferer chooses to end the relationship.

Other sufferers will judge their relationship according to what they see around them, particularly with regards to other people's relationships.

Sufferers will often experience visual intrusions that act as a 'spike' (trigger). These can include having images of kissing someone, and having constant thoughts about them. For example, an image of a partner kissing someone else may randomly enter the mind of a suffer. While most people who do not suffer from OCD would be able to dismiss this fairly easily as paranoia, a sufferer of Relationship OCD will torture themselves with thoughts of their partner being unfaithful.